Off topic--a special helpful friend

Here's  My answer to the question, “Should you pay someone for helping you with house chores when they do not live with you regularly, such as a visiting relative?” 

Here’s my heartfelt answer, “No.”

Your question implies that they are staying temporarily. They don’t have to pay over $125 a night at a hotel. They are getting that bed for free. And I’ll bet you; they are enjoying your food, heating, air conditioning, internet, tv, phone, and wifi services, too.

So, why shouldn’t they be helping around the house?

Now, another scenario. You have a helpful friend who comes once a month to help out. To do the cleaning that you are not capable of doing anymore. They are spending their time off work, gas, car wear & tear, and their physical efforts to help you. They say they are going by the “golden rule,” maybe even the “platinum rule,” and you need to pay their actions forward to someone when you are able. Fair enough.

You are talking together, enjoying each other’s company while the tasks are being done. But you feel that they shouldn’t be out-of-pocket for helping you, and you can afford to pay someone for help.

So, how about a gas card, a gift card to a favorite grocery store or restaurant.

If that won’t do, do you have a marketable skill such as painting, writing, sewing, quilting, woodworking, baking, etc.? Could you gift something they’d enjoy from the talents that you can do? Maybe even teach them a skill that they don’t have?

Hum that doesn’t work either? Have they especially admired something unique in your home, suggesting they’d love something similar in a different color? Then search until you can find that item as a gift for them.

Do the two of you have a wish bucket list of things to do together? How about planning things for both of you to do together. You are paying—a new restaurant, a play, a movie, a historic visit, etc.

None of the above fly? Sit back, relax, and enjoy the truly marvelous friend you have in your life. More importantly, please return the favor when this unique individual needs some help in their home!